I felt her creep into my bed. Wrap her arms around me, whisper into my ears dreams of a land forbidden. She came in slowly, gently, like a lover coming home, not wanting to wake, but make me aware of her presence.

She kissed my spine and I felt chills ran a marathon on it. She had this way with me, this grasp on me. Not pulling me, but luring me in, making me take my own steps towards her she gave my gut goose bumps.

She, is darkness, not as a reference or an analogy. I mean She Is Darkness. So she creeps into my bed, wraps her arms around me. Whispers into my ears dreams of a land forbidden.

She tells me death is like getting into a warm bed on a winter night and she doesn’t even have to convince me I’m alone, I can see it, I can feel it in my bone. It’s the end of they day, I’m alone in my bed my head buried in my pillow, my heart broken, my soul crushed, the wall watching tears roll down my face. I have no one to call, no one to text.

Everyone says “I’m here for you” but when I finally have the courage to talk about it and I call they’re busy suddenly no one has the time and I’m sorry I couldn’t schedule my breakdown at your earliest convenience. I’m sorry that I am broken and mangled.

But she rans her hand through my hair, she kisses my forehead, she makes me feel safe. And this is one of those night, when I move over, and make room for her besides me. Because she’s the only company I’ve ever truly known

Advertisements